Get to Know Me, Get to Know me Uncomfortably Well1. What is you middle name? 2. How old are you? 3. What is your birthday? 4. What is your zodiac sign? 5. What is your favorite color? 6. What's your lucky number? 7. Do you have any pets? 8. Where are you from? 9. How tall are you? 10. What shoe size are you? 11. How many pairs of shoes do you own? 12. What was your last dream about? 13. What talents do you have? 14. Are you psychic in any way? 15. Favorite song? 16. Favorite movie? 17. Who would be your ideal partner? 18. Do you want children? 19. Do you want a church wedding? 20. Are you religious? 21. Have you ever been to the hospital? 22. Have you ever got in trouble with the law? 23. Have you ever met any celebrities? 24. Baths or showers? 25. What color socks are you wearing? 26. Have you ever been famous? 27. Would you like to be a big celebrity? 28. What type of music do you like? 29. Have you ever been skinny dipping? 30. How many pillows do you sleep with? 31. What position do you usually sleep in? 32. How big is your house? 33. What do you typically have for breakfast? 34. Have you ever fired a gun? 35. Have you ever tried archery? 36. Favorite clean word? 37. Favorite swear word? 38. What's the longest you've ever gone without sleep? 39. Do you have any scars? 40. Have you ever had a secret admirer? 41. Are you a good liar? 42. Are you a good judge of character? 43. Can you do any other accents other than your own? 44. Do you have a strong accent? 45. What is your favorite accent? 46. What is your personality type? 47. What is your most expensive piece of clothing? 48. Can you curl your tongue? 49. Are you an innie or an outie? 50. Left or right handed? 51. Are you scared of spiders? 52. Favorite food? 53. Favorite foreign food? 54. Are you a clean or messy person? 55. Most used phrased? 56. Most used word? 57. How long does it take for you to get ready? 58. Do you have much of an ego? 59. Do you suck or bite lollipops? 60. Do you talk to yourself? 61. Do you sing to yourself? 62. Are you a good singer? 63. Biggest Fear? 64. Are you a gossip? 65. Best dramatic movie you've seen? 66. Do you like long or short hair? 67. Can you name all 50 states of America? 68. Favorite school subject? 69. Extrovert or Introvert? 70. Have you ever been scuba diving? 71. What makes you nervous? 72. Are you scared of the dark? 73. Do you correct people when they make mistakes? 74. Are you ticklish? 75. Have you ever started a rumor? 76. Have you ever been in a position of authority? 77. Have you ever drank underage? 78. Have you ever done drugs? 79. Who was your first real crush? 80. How many piercings do you have? 81. Can you roll your Rs?" 82. How fast can you type? 83. How fast can you run? 84. What color is your hair? 85. What color is your eyes? 86. What are you allergic to? 87. Do you keep a journal? 88. What do your parents do? 89. Do you like your age? 90. What makes you angry? 91. Do you like your own name? 92. Have you already thought of baby names, and if so what are they? 93. Do you want a boy a girl for a child? 94. What are you strengths? 95. What are your weaknesses? 96. How did you get your name? 97. Were your ancestors royalty? 98. Do you have any scars? 99. Color of your bedspread? 100. Color of your room?
"1. If you like someone, wait.
2. Give lots of compliments, even if you’re shy. Everyone else is too.
3. Change. Get a haircut, try new perfume, get new sheets. Become better than you were before.
4. Eat healthier. Learn to cook something fancy.
5. Get up earlier and watch the sun come up.
6. Wear soft clothes, take a bath, drink something warm.
7. Meet someone new, even just a friend.
8. Become closer with your friends and your family. Call your mother. Cry with your best friend. Tell everyone how much you appreciate them.
9. Keep your room clean. Buy some candles. Let the natural light in.
10. Make a list of reasons why you’ll be better off without them. Believe they are true, because they are.
11. Listen to new music.
12. Write everything you’re thinking and feeling. Write letters. Write happy letters, sad letters, and angry letters, even if you’re never going to send them.
13. It’s okay to be sad, but not forever. Sadness is not as beautiful as music makes it seem. Lack of sleep makes your eyes droopy, not deep. Wake up every morning and tell yourself you’re going to have a good day.
14. Go to the library. Don’t forget to look in the music section.
15. Remove them from your life. Get rid of the things they gave you if they make you sad. They’re not worth it. You will never be happy if you continue to hold on to the things that make you sad.
16. Make new memories.
17. Try to find something to appreciate in everything you do or experience.
18. Being alone is okay, you don’t have to surround yourself with people.
19. Become your own best friend. Buy yourself coffee and drink it alone in a cafe. Take your time.
20. Learn to love every bit of yourself."
-How to feel better and become better (via essasays)
August 21, 1993
It has been a 20 years of a happy and fruitful life. I am very thankful to my creator for the gift of life, the gift of love, the gift of friends, and most especially, the gift of family. I couldn’t ask for more because I receive more than enough of what I asked. I am thankful to the true people and true friends who walked into my life, the journey with you guys are worth experiencing. I am also very thankful to my family who never give up on me no matter how spoiled of a brat I am, they never treat me bad instead they showered and keep on showering me their love. Again, I am thankful to my Creator for I will never be where I am and at my first stage of my twenties if it wasn’t because of Him. His unconditional love is mu driving force to continue living. My life is full of blessings that day to day I always praise God and thank Him for these blessings. THANK YOU, I AM NOW 20 YEARS OLD. :)
I’ve done it again. I’m hopeless. I couldn’t even seek for care and comfort. I always feel alone. I always feel stupid and powerless. I don’t know what to do. I want to talk about it but I don’t know whom to trust. I’m being drag down by my own insanity. I hope, one day I could escape from this nightmare.
I will never do it again.
I did it again today. I pity myself. I felt high and excited and some unexplained feelings. Moments after, I’m back to my senses. I can feel the rushing regrets flowing in every vein of my body. I wanna fast forward time to the future where I will never do things like this, to the future where I wont even worry that I even did it today. March 23, 2013 at around 1-2 am, I saw what happened to me. I saw what I did to myself. I saw the outcome and I regretted what I have done to myself. But after that day, I never learned. Though I’m getting worse yet not the way I felt and happened that day. But then I never got the guts to stop myself. Again and again, I felt high and I can feel the ranging of blood in my body and the feeling of regrets after. Until today. Today was different from the normal days yet was so similar to that of the 23rd of March. The outcome, the effect, the regrets, they were all the same. I couldn’t imagine my future if I continue this. Only today I become certain. I will never do it again to myself, to my body, to my health. From the very first I already knew its effects but I still tried. Now that I have felt every regret it could offer, I am retreating myself from doing it again. I wanna save myself while it’s still early. I will never do it again.
Turn out of events
I’m already convince that today’s one of the many worst day of my life. Until. Until a sudden turn of events made today, my day. I couldn’t even explain the happiness I am feeling right now. I miss this feeling. You know, being appreaciated by the people you cared the most. It was just so fulfilling. :)
Worst scenario: Caught in the act.
If time will come and secrets will be unfold, and you happen to ask “Why?”, I think I will pause. Refresh every detail, every bit of it from day one. Then I’ll be asking myself, “Why?”. Why did I keep it a secret? Why do I need to keep it as a secret? I think. Then I look at those secrets and unintentionally, I caught myself looking at your work. Then I felt dismayed and down. I thought I already built our connection through the secret I have made. No one elder knew about it, reason why at first and through the process of conversing with you secretly was never questioned and I thought it was no biggie. But today I ask myself, “Why do I need to keep it as a secret?”, while I was looking again at your work. Later on, I convinced myself that I already have an answer. Your work. You are known by your work and your wits and by just being yourself. You are you and I am me. I’m out of your league. That’s the reason. I couldn’t face you, look at you, and never got the guts to talk to you. It was lame, but I still took the chance I got. It was the only way I could speak my mind and let you know what I was thinking, what I’m feeling, and hoping you would feel the same way too. But I’m being irrational. Ofcourse this is no fairytale. Me, keeping those secret just to talk to you does not mean anything at all for you. You think I’m just an internet related data. Ouch, that hurts. I felt real while keeping those secrets, never thought you felt the opposite. But A secret is A secret. Whoever figure this out, ain’t no genius because this is just a one-plus-one-problem.